What a weekend! Friday saw Kate and I heading up to London early doors to attend a pop-up Moët Academy. Neither of us knew what to expect, but I was going as it obviously involved champagne drinking, and she was going as she likes champagne, has a sense of adventure, a healthy budget and a kind habit of indulging my folly. We were greeted with a glass of water which was not what I was expecting but after a 360 degree tour of the virtual vineyard for 45 minutes, the serious business of tasting began. They first gave us Prosecco so that we could all spit it into our branded Moët buckets in disgust... I surprised myself by not being the biggest champagne snob in there. Other people took it really properly seriously. I was just trying to guzzle as many free bubbles as possible before being kicked out. With the help of a winning smile and a wink at the barman I think Kate and I possibly banked more than our fair share... We glided giggling down in the lift as we were thrown out, hoping to find the loos on the way and wishing au revoir to our fellow connoisseurs; only to take a wrong turn and have to go back in the lift to the toilet as we had done a drunken loop and had to drift past the same people once again, feeling just a little less sophistimacated... Fortunately as we left the building I was immediately propositioned by a tramp. I didn't want to take up his kind offer for a drink but I think he had correctly sussed out the alcoholic capability of his proposed drinking partner if perhaps not quite the class... Cue Kate and Nikki heading to Bubbledogs for hot dogs and more champagne.
Saturday I hopped on a train and joined my husband in Redditch for Lindsey's 40th. Stu was picking me up at the station but I stomped straight past him as I was so convinced that he wouldn't bother getting out of the car to come and meet me - who says romance is dead after nearly ten years of marriage?! He bought me lunch, then I reluctantly shelled out for dinner but then turned up cashless to the party, which of course was cash only. My darling husband used to be a right tight-wad when I met him but has morphed into generosity itself, (well nearly). Grumping away he was that I didn't have the readies, until he found out it was £4.65 for a pint and a glass of wine. Got to love a social club in the Midlands! Suddenly I was no longer the devil incarnate and for possibly the only time in my life was a bit of a cheap date.
Good job, as today I reversed at speed into a brand new Audi. Well done me. I left a note on the window that said: 'Hello, I'm Nikki. I crashed into your car; sorry.' and my phone number. What else is there to say? A very nice, understanding gentleman left a voicemail for me whilst I was watching 'Zootropolis' at the cinema and I rang him back playing the helpless, dumb blonde (yes - it was acting, of course), and we had a very civilised and St Albans conversation about how my insurance was going to go up and never, ever come down again but ho, ho, ho as long as nobody was hurt and yes of course it could happen to ANYONE, so all was okay. The patronising subtext was of course, 'stupid f-ing women drivers' but hey, we rode it out. I now need to deal with the fortnight of ribbing from my husband and father of course...
Three and a half day week coming up followed by tenth wedding anniversary celebrations in Cornwall, a birthday and then two weeks off. Not too shabby. This Monday is showing Mondays what they should be like (car crash excepted). Roll on tomorrow and my form's 'ISIS assembly'. We are treading the thin and controversial line to get a powerful message across. What could possibly go wrong with an ethnically diverse, dramatically challenged, 'interesting' Year 7 form led by a possibly slightly hungover, dangerous reverser of a form tutor? I'll let you know... ;-)
Monday, 28 March 2016
Saturday, 12 March 2016
Super Saturdays
I had 11 hours sleep last night. It was utter bliss. I awoke briefly at 9.30am as Stu left the bed and Zak entered it. I soon ejected Zak when I realised that he can't jump on an IPad game without kicking his legs. I guess it is like when I put the brake on whilst sitting in the passenger seat of Stu's car; intrinsic. Zak left and I dozed for a few minutes and then Sebi took his place. This was more restful and I carried on sleeping until 10.50. Lazy-arse-happy-Mumma.
An hour after I had breakfasted, we went out for lunch. That is when you know it is going to be a good Saturday. We headed into town to a fantastic burger restaurant called 'Relish'. Parking in St. Albans can be hellish on a Saturday so when I spied a street space very near to the restaurant I yelled and Stu duly pulled into it. The kids and I started sauntering towards 'Relish' whilst Stu went to get a ticket. Two minutes later however, my husband was stropping about in a mood about the ridiculous parking charge and told me I should have let him park in the car park instead. The sun was shining, I was determined to have a nice family Saturday, so I told him he was very welcome to move the car into the car park in order to save a few pennies if it was going to make him any happier. Unbelievably, he moved the car into the car park only to find out it would cost him 30p more so moved it back out onto the street again. I said nothing as 15 minutes later we walked to the restaurant. Nothing. Not a thing. I did laugh in his face a bit however...
We decided after lunch we would park near my Nana's nursing home and Stu could take the boys to the park whilst I went to see her for a little while. Zak legged it into the park far ahead of everyone and launched himself at a swing in ecstasy. As he jumped on, he hadn't realised that someone before him had rolled the swing up and as he landed it unrolled leaving him hanging upside down.
'DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDD!' he cried, but managed to hang upside down bat-like until Stu caught up.
I spent an interesting half an hour or so with Nana where the conversation wandered from reality to fantasy and back again. When Dad spoke to her later she told him that she had had a lovely afternoon with Mary (my sister)...
I'm currently snuggled on the sofa with my biggest boy and a glass of champagne watching 'The Voice' and having our normal Saturday night discussion about the Transgender performer. Zak being delightfully innocent, me being incredibly politically correct and Stu snorting from the end of the sofa. Happy Saturday Night everyone!
An hour after I had breakfasted, we went out for lunch. That is when you know it is going to be a good Saturday. We headed into town to a fantastic burger restaurant called 'Relish'. Parking in St. Albans can be hellish on a Saturday so when I spied a street space very near to the restaurant I yelled and Stu duly pulled into it. The kids and I started sauntering towards 'Relish' whilst Stu went to get a ticket. Two minutes later however, my husband was stropping about in a mood about the ridiculous parking charge and told me I should have let him park in the car park instead. The sun was shining, I was determined to have a nice family Saturday, so I told him he was very welcome to move the car into the car park in order to save a few pennies if it was going to make him any happier. Unbelievably, he moved the car into the car park only to find out it would cost him 30p more so moved it back out onto the street again. I said nothing as 15 minutes later we walked to the restaurant. Nothing. Not a thing. I did laugh in his face a bit however...
We decided after lunch we would park near my Nana's nursing home and Stu could take the boys to the park whilst I went to see her for a little while. Zak legged it into the park far ahead of everyone and launched himself at a swing in ecstasy. As he jumped on, he hadn't realised that someone before him had rolled the swing up and as he landed it unrolled leaving him hanging upside down.
'DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAADDDDDDDDDDDDD!' he cried, but managed to hang upside down bat-like until Stu caught up.
I spent an interesting half an hour or so with Nana where the conversation wandered from reality to fantasy and back again. When Dad spoke to her later she told him that she had had a lovely afternoon with Mary (my sister)...
I'm currently snuggled on the sofa with my biggest boy and a glass of champagne watching 'The Voice' and having our normal Saturday night discussion about the Transgender performer. Zak being delightfully innocent, me being incredibly politically correct and Stu snorting from the end of the sofa. Happy Saturday Night everyone!
Sunday, 6 March 2016
Mamma Mia
Mothering Sunday is just coming into its own. Stu has gone off to watch the footie, my parents have left, the boys are on the IPads and I have just opened my motherly bottle of champagne. Bliss.
The boys were under strict instructions this morning that the way to make Mummy have a really wonderful start to Mother's Day was to not arrive in to see me before they were invited. Good job as a 'civilised' few drinks and a dog walk last night turned into the normal Nikki-Sam carnage...
Once I had translated Zak's card this morning from: 'Smelly, not all Mothers are like you' to 'Sadly, not all Mothers are like you', we began getting on a little better. I'm still not convinced that my original guess wasn't right. It would have been a fair point first thing this morning too.
We had a delicious lunch at The Plough with the four of us, plus Granny and Grandad, plus a large amount of both Beaumont and Samuel Ryder students and parents. One of the members of staff there is a parent and took the time to thank me for increasing her daughter's confidence at school. Really lovely until she finished with the information that her daughter had asked her to find out how many glasses of wine Mrs Ward drinks with her Sunday lunch. Not as many as she would like to under the beady eyes of students. I remember our poor Geography teacher at STAGS being spotted once coming out of Budgens clutching a bottle of gin by a member of Year 11. It's now the only thing she is remembered for. I am so screwed.
Our lunch took quite a long time to arrive today as they were extraordinarily busy in there. The boys were 'STARVING' so Dad saved the day with some well timed packets of crisps. When they had finished Sebi asked how long the food would be and I said five minutes and told him to count to 300. Which of course he did. When he was at about 265 he was eyeing me suspiciously and my parents enquired what my Plan B was if the food didn't arrive in exactly 35 seconds time. How many packets of crisps have you got up your sleeve Grandad?
Zak had to shoot off to cricket straight after lunch so Mum, Dad, Sebi and I went home for coffee. Grandad gave Sebi a pound and Sebi said that he now had £52.76 in his money box. Grandad refused to take his word for it and counted it all out with Sebi sitting next to him asking me what on earth he was doing as he had told him exactly how much was in there and so he was wasting his time. Grandad was far too overexcited to find that in fact there was only £52.74 in there and to prove Sebi wrong. Until that is he got up to go and found he was sitting on two pence. The look Sebi shot him was a six year old equivalent of sticking two fingers up I think...
I presented Mum with her bouquet as she left and the boys looked bemused. 'She can't drink that' quipped Zak. You really can tell whose children they are can't you.
Happy Mother's Day lovely people! Cheers!
The boys were under strict instructions this morning that the way to make Mummy have a really wonderful start to Mother's Day was to not arrive in to see me before they were invited. Good job as a 'civilised' few drinks and a dog walk last night turned into the normal Nikki-Sam carnage...
Once I had translated Zak's card this morning from: 'Smelly, not all Mothers are like you' to 'Sadly, not all Mothers are like you', we began getting on a little better. I'm still not convinced that my original guess wasn't right. It would have been a fair point first thing this morning too.
We had a delicious lunch at The Plough with the four of us, plus Granny and Grandad, plus a large amount of both Beaumont and Samuel Ryder students and parents. One of the members of staff there is a parent and took the time to thank me for increasing her daughter's confidence at school. Really lovely until she finished with the information that her daughter had asked her to find out how many glasses of wine Mrs Ward drinks with her Sunday lunch. Not as many as she would like to under the beady eyes of students. I remember our poor Geography teacher at STAGS being spotted once coming out of Budgens clutching a bottle of gin by a member of Year 11. It's now the only thing she is remembered for. I am so screwed.
Our lunch took quite a long time to arrive today as they were extraordinarily busy in there. The boys were 'STARVING' so Dad saved the day with some well timed packets of crisps. When they had finished Sebi asked how long the food would be and I said five minutes and told him to count to 300. Which of course he did. When he was at about 265 he was eyeing me suspiciously and my parents enquired what my Plan B was if the food didn't arrive in exactly 35 seconds time. How many packets of crisps have you got up your sleeve Grandad?
Zak had to shoot off to cricket straight after lunch so Mum, Dad, Sebi and I went home for coffee. Grandad gave Sebi a pound and Sebi said that he now had £52.76 in his money box. Grandad refused to take his word for it and counted it all out with Sebi sitting next to him asking me what on earth he was doing as he had told him exactly how much was in there and so he was wasting his time. Grandad was far too overexcited to find that in fact there was only £52.74 in there and to prove Sebi wrong. Until that is he got up to go and found he was sitting on two pence. The look Sebi shot him was a six year old equivalent of sticking two fingers up I think...
I presented Mum with her bouquet as she left and the boys looked bemused. 'She can't drink that' quipped Zak. You really can tell whose children they are can't you.
Happy Mother's Day lovely people! Cheers!
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