Yesterday morning, we all floated downstairs, full of smiles at our change in routine; a later start and Mummy at home. Everybody had something different for breakfast - my smile did not crack. We walked to school on a beautiful frosty morning, waved the chiddlers a fond farewell and I went off on a refreshing morning run. I love my job but I had a flicker of doubt yesterday morning that I should be working full time when the kids are still at primary school as the whole experience had been so pleasant.
Fast forward twenty four hours: Mummy got up later this morning due to a larger amount of alcohol consumption yesterday. The Friday treat of Dairylea Dunkers had been overlooked in the post-holiday quick-shop and so two packets of rubbish Monday - Thursday raisins were mutinously packed into school bags. When I was standing on the doorstep ready to go the not-quite-as-cute-as-yesterday rugrats announced that they hadn't done their teeth. Of course, Sebi does the full two minutes on the tooth timer I bought him even though I was yelling that a few less seconds really wouldn't make that much difference for one day.
"But why did you buy me the timer then if it doesn't make any difference?"
He then had to add on a few seconds as he had stopped to talk to me.
We hurtled up the road and bumped into the boy that Zak had told me had been mean in the playground yesterday who then started walking with us. They are walking and having a nice chat, with yesterday's argument obviously forgotten but I cannot help myself at finally being able to be Mother Protector so am hissing into Zak's ear:
"Do you want me to say something? Shall I give him a Mummy Special Glare?"
Zak put his hood up, his head down and walked a little faster, hoping that the ground would swallow me whole.
I got so sick of playground politics when I was a full time Mum but nowadays a trip to the playground is a treat. Sebi's gorgeous teacher still managed to smile at me for the second day on the trot as I leapt about in her face telling her that MY school still isn't back at work today and I'm going to the pub for lunch AGAIN.
When I saw my partner in crime for today, Ali, I jumped up and down waving with excitement that we were pub-lunching. Ayelet in front of her thought I was jumping about because I was excited to see her instead and then realised I was waving at the person behind her...#awks
"Don't be sad. I was only waving at Ali because I was excited about drinking wine at lunchtime"; I said; trying to make Ayelet feel better but in fact handing out insults all round.
So, it is best for everybody that I have a Dry January (8th - 12th) and head back to work next week. I'm not cut out for this stay at home Mum business because I don't bloody stay at home; I stay in the pub.
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